Humboldt Pot-pourri-A Special Edition

One cannot visit this area without coming to a new appreciation for the primary "economic engine of Humboldt"--marijuana.

Warning, this is a "special edition" of my blog and will discuss marijuana.  It's illegal to have but not to write about!

Here are some basic facts of LEGAL cannabis use:

Fact:  It is legal to grow cannabis in California as long as you have a 215 (medical) card.

Fact:  Anyone can get a 215 card as long as you complain to a doctor "I can't sleep"

Fact:  You are permitted to grow 60 plants of cannabis indoors or 99 plants outdoors in Humboldt county for personal use.

Fact:  It is against Federal law to grow, possess, transport, sell or use cannabis.
Fact:  The medical cannabis market is huge; there are more herbal pharmaceutical stores in California than Starbucks, McDonald's and Wendy's COMBINED.

Agricultural specialty products are a key to the health of the cannaibis support economy.  Here are some examples of products:

"Pillow-type" water holding bags exhibited along the road as large as a Saddlebag single-wide mobile home

Soil amendment is probably the most complex and growing business.  Compost is packaged in huge bags and overloaded pickups are common sights.  

Here is a typical online discussion by growers about soil enrichment:

"Purple Maxx is a nice product that definately increases resin production but unless your strain has back genetics of blue/purple in it, it doesn't really turn your shit purple.  Both gravity and purple maxx have high ppm so when given to your plants, I recommend doing it on the water days not the feeding days. "

Chemists are consulted to create soil and mineral additives to make the 99 maximum outdoor plants yield the equivalent of, for example, 500 plants using many of the ideas espoused by Charles Wilbur when he grew his monster tomatoes.

There is a product system called DEP which are indoor rotating lights on tracks perfectly synchronized to the growth cycle of the cannabis plant.  

Some businesses supply convenience products to the folks who camp out on the mountains in tents 24/7  to "guard" the product as it grows.   

The turkey baster bag industry tries hard to keep up with demand (turkey baking bags are uniquely suited  because they are "smellproof" for storing harvested buds and are in high demand).  

Graduate students in biology who are tissue-culturing certain strains to achieve optimal nausea and pain-controlling characteristics as well as develop strains resistant to disease.    


The list goes on into ever more esoteric and scientific areas of tweaking growth characteristics of this plant.

User industries abound; tee shirts, sweatshirt, smoking apparatus.  Some of the prettiest blown glass around is in the headshops. 

I really liked the "Skunk with the reddened eyes" tee shirt design.

The industry is not without harm and danger however, as many farm encampments are armed and the environmental destruction from polluting waterways for irrigation is significant.  There are environmental groups that do reclamation work to "clean up" the farmed areas.

Rents on large homes in remote areas are triple "normal" rates.  These homes are in demand by growers who need a place to dry and trim the harvest.  Trimmers migrate to this area every fall looking for high-paying trimming jobs.  Real estate agents specialize in farm acreage and other property.

Now to the lighter side!  Billboards with double entendres. 

 

For my introduction to agricultural and recreational excess, I went with the fam, armed with folding lawnchairs and blankets, to an outdoor theater production named Mary Jane--The Musical.  This was one of the featured activities of the annual Mad River Festival in Blue Lake, CA.  This was a debut production and was playing to sold out audiences.

The plot loosely revolves around 50-something Mary Jane's “coronation” as Queen of The Emerald Ball.  The ball celebrates Mary Jane for being a first-generation dope grower who migrated to rural Humboldt in the hippie-driven 60's and discovered the simple joys of beginning the back-to-the-land cultivation of what became a “growing” cash crop.  But, just like in Rocky Horror Picture Show, the plot is beside the point. The eccentric song and dance numbers are what matters. 

Played, sung and danced with pizzazz by a fearless cast of performers wearing “leafy,” tye-dye-colorful and retro costumes, the musical styles are as varied as the clothes.   

This particular photo was a performer dressed as an "indoor grow"; the counterpart "outdoor grow"  later appeared and they sang a witty duet about their differences and similarities.

The show serves up a potpourri of original, insightful songs.  Songs with titles like “It's Kush to be Mary Jane,” “Humboldt Honey,” “Grow Inside,” “Green Like Money,” “Why Is Whiskey Legal and Pot is Not,” “Ghost Town,” “My Son,” and “Nuggy Nuggy" reflect the broad scope of the community's attitudes, fears and misunderstandings about the controversial weed.  


Between songs, Mary Jane provides witty observations:  “Why would I want to live in Arcata?” asks Mary Jane. “That’s where the people sleep outside and the plants sleep inside.”

After the play was over, I asked my fam to translate some of these terms.  I had no idea what a "nuggy" was, nor what "kush" was.   I inquired about the song "Ghost Town" and they explained why legalization was defeated in California--legalization would occasion the beginning of the end of communities and a subculture built entirely on cash-crop marijuana.  The song "My Son" told of Mary Jane's guilt for teaching her son of no other way to live in the larger society and failing to educate him for anything beyond growing cannabis.  I gave it two thumbs up! 

I also give two thumbs up to learning a heck of a lot more about the good And the bad about the legal marijuana industry in California.   The industry has sustained a colorful subculture unlike any other I have ever see or heard about--the people here are very different in so many ways.  At times, I felt like I was in a foreign country!  

Regardless of how one feels about the whole subject of marijuana, I admired seeing the entrepreneurial spirit and self-reliance that is pervasive in the northern California psyche and so sadly disappearing from our society.  

Critters in the Redwoods

I'm far behind in my blog updates; my only excuse is "too busy having fun with my sister" in the Redwoods of Eureka CA.

Before arriving here, I had arranged to meet my sister Sharon and her daughter, Jessica and my niece, Claire in Portland, OR.  

Note the graphic painted on the street.  The Pacific Northwest folks are very expressive, hyped up on coffee and must stay busy.
 

Sharon accompanied me on a Road Trip down the Coast of Oregon to Eureka.  

We had a blast.  Stopped at a seaside casino in Lincoln City and Sharon WON!  


This photo was taken on a glorious and rare sunny coastal day.  It was a perfect day for a drive on the coast.


We stopped at one of my Passport membership campgrounds and, despite my GPS, map software, a Google map aerial previsit of the area together with my experience and 6th sense about getting around--I could not find the campground and had to phone twice and finally asked the campground owner to come out and watch for me!  

Later, I found out why I kept missing it; the ground-level sign was almost completely obscured by grass and weeds!

This is where I am parked at my sister's home.  The driveway.  The forest behind me (locally called the Gully) is where the deer, bear and other varmits hang out.

One morning shortly after I arrived, the dogs went ballistic and attacked the windows!  A bear wandered into the yard looking for food, passed within 15' of the windows, ambled up the driveway and stopped traffic in the road before proceeding through neighboring yards.  This is a common occurence and no one even bothers to call Animal Control. 

Immediately upon sighting the bear, Sharon began calling the neighbors and a nearby friend to "get their dogs in".  Minutes later, the entire neighborhood sounded like a kennel in an uproar with dogs barking their heads off as the bear wandered through.  The bear apparently knows when "Trash Pickup Day"is!

Speaking of varmits, I caught one!  Sharon awoke one morning to find a piece of fuzz on the floor that hadn't been there the night before.  Hmmmm....puzzling...maybe a wind current blew it in?  Later that day, I picked up an apple to eat from the counter basket and....eeeyyyeewww...it had already been bitten into!  I showed it to Sharon and we looked closely at it.  The indentations were clearly not human teeth marks--they were way too small and numerous.  

The only answer was--MOUSE!  So, we set about frantically pulling out appliances from the wall to search for entry points and filling them with that foamy stuff that you spray on and it expands.  Then, we pulled everything out of the pantry, found "evidence" of mice and proceeded to pitch everything not hermetically sealed.  

Third phase, slather peanut butter on mouse traps and place under house.  

The mouse traps worked and 3 days later, I entered the house for coffee and saw a motionless, gray furry mound.  Upon closer inspection, it appeared to be either a large dying mouse or a small dying rat with peanut butter on its whiskers.  We got one of the vacuum containers and I was able to corral it inside.  We pushed the vacuum top and eventually it died of oxygen starvation.


You decide--rat or mouse?

Another critter that loves the moist soil and debris of the Redwoods is everywhere and famous--the Banana Slug--a disgusting, mucous-coated, gelantinous creature with no role in life but to leave sticky booger tracks wherever it goes.

It is a souvenir in Chocolate Shops.

It is a teeshirt decal and is the school mascot for University of Santa Cruz.  This particular one is really gross because the trail left by the slub is in 3-D:  glossy with a smooth, cool texture.

Here is what one really looks like in nature; this one is sliming its way across the grill cover.

And, not to be overlooked-- the most fearsome critters of all---the Creeping Couch Canines!  

These creatures plot and plan...here is Cassie and Suki talking in code about their next victim.

Like the slow-moving slug, Suki pretends to snooze harmlessly at your feet, while inching toward an unsuspecting Norm and planning a horrific attack on his vitals!  Norm is obviously frozen with terror.

Cassie has really enjoyed her time here; she has rebonded with her species, being alone in the company of 3 other dogs for much of the days I was away.  She actually found her place in the heirarchy and was content with being "Beta Bitch".  The Alpha dog is Bella, a pug with an attitude.  Here they are together, miraculously peaceful in each other's company!

Reggae, Rodeo and Restaurants

I decided to write about my experiences here in Eureka by "topic" rather than chronologically, since I am already behind...

It has been a whirlwind of activities here!  I was reminded that the population here is imprisoned for 9 months of the year where they cannot see 50 ft ahead because of fog, their hair and clothes are rarely dry, they close shops and schools on a rare sunny day, furniture and accessories are nailed down to avoid breakage during the frequent earthquakes and everyone is on alert for the tsunami sirens.  Their pasty-white bodies emerge with a vengeance in June.  Here is a weather sign.

One might ask why anyone would live here?   I can't imagine it but, people who live here are fiercely protective of their lifestyle and most have generations of family in the area.  They are also tied by the unique industry of the area.  So, when the weather breaks sometime in June, all recreational and agricultural hell breaks loose!  Everyone is outdoors partying REALLY HARD!  So, that is the insanity I have been caught up in!

First outing was a trek across 1/2 mile of sand dunes to the site of the annual Sand Sculpture Contest.  Thank heaven this occurred at the beginning of my visit BEFORE I gained the extra 10 lbs!  It was a  brutal hike. 

Unfortunately, by the time we got in gear, the tide had started to come in and most of the sculptures were kaput.  However, this one still survived. 

An odd phenomenon occurs here; the daylight extends until 9:30pm.  The daytime at 8:30pm looks more like 5pm back home.  So, activity is extended with longer days.  It's only fair!

An unanticipated activity was occasioned by a conversation between my sis and me.  She owns an RV park and must regularly empty the quarters out of her soda machine and laundry. Every week, she has 2 large bank bags of coins to handle.  The problem is there are no coin-sorting machines in town and no banks will take the coins, so they tend to accumulate and she eventually spends hours rolling them.  

So, we started brainstorming and decided to see if the casinos would take the coins.  Lo and behold--ALL the casinos take them!  There are 3 casinos within 30 minutes--2 of them charge 5% and one of them does not charge anything!  

So, each week, Sharon and I visit the casino, exchange the coins, play some video poker, have lunch and take home from $25-$100 in winnings.  My sis is very lucky and always walks after a big win.  

This casino in the photo is Cher-ae Heights and has a beautiful restaurant overlooking the rocky shoreline of Trinidad Cove. 

We attended a Dog Show.  The Kennel Club Lost Coast Chapter held a competition at the Fairgrounds in Ferndale and it was fascinating to see so many familiar and "new" breeds of dogs in "perfect" condition.  Here's a little guy who got pooped out from all the fluffing and fussing.

One of our many jaunts took us to an event held at the Fairgrounds called "Humboldt-Made Fair"--celebrating the awesome people and good stuff made by Humboldt enterpreneurs and artisans.  The fair features businesses that produce specialty agriculture products, food and beverage creations, manufactured and crafted goods.  

The Fair also had a terrific show with a Pirate Bird Trainer and his macaws and sun conjure birds.  My favorite trick was:  a squadron of sun conjures zooms overhead and, when people in the audience wave a dollar bill, they zero in, land on the person, remove the dollar bill and carry the bill in their beak and deposit it in a money jar. Then, they perch on the landing ramp and await their treat.  

The audience loved it so much that they kept waving bills at the birds during the entire show and the Pirate accumulated a nice full jar of money! Inspired!  Forget about tips and just train your birds to collect money! The Dollar Bill Trick‬‏ - YouTube

The fair food tent had a winery sampling and a 10 beer sampler from the local brewery Lost Coast Brewery.   It's a good thing were were only a mile away from home!  

This is a decorative door panel from the Lost Coast Brewery restaurant, which we also dined at.  They also serve a 10-beer sampler on a plank that has holes in it for the 4oz glasses for $10.  Lost Coast Brewery

The local artist who designed all the beer labels also painted murals on many of the buildings in downtown Eureka and his art also is featured in downtown bistros and coffee shops.  This one is on the Performing Arts Hall.

This one is on the side of a barbershop (yes, they still have barbershops here).

This coastal region is a Winery haven.  This scene is typical of the constant climate--misty, foggy and around 55 degrees. 

This is the Moonstone Winery in Trinidad, CA right on the ocean.

They have people who will drive groups around to the wineries in their beat-up 70's Volkswagon roof popups. 

Sharon and I sampled but none were wonderful enough to buy.

On the 4th of July, downtown Eureka pulls out all the stops with the Old Town shops displaying their stuff on the sidewalk, the usual food vendors, a harborside carnival of rides, street dancers,









biker characters, local bands and craft vendors setting up shop on the sidewalks.

The evening 4th of July party was hosted by my sister's friend, Theresa, who lives across the street. 

The setting was breathtaking; her home is nestled within a redwood forest.

Food and wine were plentiful

...and later the group gathered around the fire ring

Norm was in charge of burning the marshmallows for s'mores.  

The perfect ending to a wonderful 4th party was...NO FIREWORKS!!!

The MamaJamma festival of all in this area is the annual, renowned Reggae on the River.  

It is a 3 day fest and attracts reclusive rasta-types to come down out of the mountains for miles around.  

The very first sensation on arrival inside the event grounds was the odor of umm...human beings that do not observe the same level of hygiene that most of us do.  

We hoped the river would dilute the problem but the water was too cold for the usual mass butt-naked immersion.  

Thank goodness for "sensory fatigue"--soon, it didn't matter!  

The games began with the heavy reggae beat as background music for the afternoon!  This is my nephew Luke and neice-in-law, Helena and no one knows who the tie-dye dude is.

A crowd scene; 

We found a mellow place under a tree to set up our group and drink beer... this is my brother, Phil on a beer run.

Newphew Luke proudly proclaims his Indian name is "Runs with Beer".  Luke is a marathoner which makes this teeshirt so very special!  This is Luke's signature "pose".

Here is Helena who should probably slow down... 

...it looks like Norm has completely stopped! 

But Norm soon rallied and demonstrated his Yoga technique for anyone caring to watch.  Hey Norm, take it easy--you still have 6 months to get Medicare!

Sharon relaxed with the event publication; note the graphic leaf next to the article about the upcoming Hemp Festival.

The atmosphere of the festival was mellow and relaxing.  Pictured is sister Sharon, her husband Norm, Helena and Luke.

I rode home north on US101 with my brother, Phillip, in the brand new red Camaro convertible he rented.  The convertible top completely disappears into the trunk and all the instrument controls display as holograms on the windshield.  Very weird.

it was an amazing scenic sunset ride-one of those beautiful snapshots that stay in your memory forever! 

While my brother and nephew were here visiting their sisters from Washington DC, we thought we might do something a bit rougher and decided on the Fortuna Rodeo. 

The announcer chitchat was real corny but the action was exciting; the only part that makes me cringe is roping the calves.

Before the rodeo was a ridiculously overportioned chuckwagon dinner. 

The meat portions were so huge we took home 3 lbs of beef.

It is no wonder that I am wearing an extra 10 lbs as I depart Eureka!

The day before my brother and nephew had to leave to go back to DC, we all went for an outing in downtown Eureka to the Farmer's Market.  

These Eurekans don't do anything "straight" and I photographed these children dancing wildly while musicians played music. 

We had fresh ground coffee and a sweet at a street side bistro.  This is Luke in front of the earthquake warning sign that was on the front of the coffee shop.  The sign says "This is an unreinforced masonry building.  You may not be safe inside or near unreinforced masonry during an earthquake".

We walked off our pastry calories with a stroll on the Eureka Harbor Boardwalk.  

This is a view north and you can see the Fog Line which always lingers at the coastline.

We finished our day outing with shopping and lunch.

I am not even going to attempt to remember the  many restaurants I ate at with my sister and friends/family.   

We were "out and about" almost daily--during my stay here, we had our hair done, I had a facial and 2 body massages, visited friends and also spent some time at her office at the RV park.  

Here is my sister holding up some of the many signs she posts at her park.  Her stories about the tenants are extremely funny.  These are mostly tenants "without a clue".  She claims to "manage by rhyme"--a technique she learned from the OJ trial--remember "If the glove fits, you must acquit!"?  She teaches her tenants that "You must Pay to Stay" and "If you park on the grass, I'll kick out your ass".  She says it works fairly well--people tend to recite the rules in singsong manner and retain the rules much better than the written form.  She "makes deals" with tenants who break rules and she imposes a fine  "If you pay on time, you avoid the fine" or "If you pay today, your fine goes away".  Wow I am so impressed at my sister's management skills!

Sharon "won" an auction for 30 gallons of ice cream and a 30 minute magician act, so she decided to have an ice cream/magician party.  Here is our magician in his pink tuxedo doing card tricks, which he did very well.

Here he is with my brother and nephew.  He is practicing to go to Vegas or maybe try out for America's Got Talent.




Generally, we ate out almost daily which has been wonderful but played havoc with my waistline.  Restaurants in Eureka tend to be very small and intimate, occupying tiny storefronts.   Townspeople have been successful rejecting big box business such as Walmart and Red Lobster and most eateries are local and owner-owned with incredible menus!  

I have emptied the fridge of all but protein drinks for my trip home...